Sunday, June 21, 2015

WALKING WITH MY DAD AND OTHER SPECIAL MEMORIES

With my Daddy and sister Laura at the Atlanta Zoo,
many years ago - me on the right
One of my earliest memories is of my dad taking me to walk while my mom took care of my little sister. It’s a vague memory of a happy time, just the two of us, walking around the block. Adding a sibling is a rough time for a child who goes from being an only to sharing the parents. I was the older of two but have no memories of being an only. But I do have memories of time with my dad as he made sure I didn’t feel left out after my sister was born.
Peter with Ann-Bailey and their girls
 Lilly Bell and Harper Christmas 2014
Now our son, Peter, and son-in-law, Drew, each have two children: a three year old and a one year old. They each make sure they have time to give the older girls special “daddy time” while the mom takes care of the little one. I’m sure when the girls are older this will retain memories of these special times just for them with their dad. Addie loves going to walk with her dad; just the two of them having their special time. Peter enjoys taking Lilly Bell to ballet on Saturday mornings or to swimming lessons, giving them some special time just for the two of them.
I have other special memories with my dad:  my sister and I going to the golf course with him, walking with him while he played golf; having him take us out to sell Girl Scout Cookies; going on plane trips with him; all of us going on picnics and to Stone Mountain. It’s not only the big events that create the best memories but the everyday things that form the fabric of our lives: family meals, walks, time together. Both of my parents are gone now, but the memories remain forever; they gave me the foundation for building my own family.   
Father’s Day is one of those often glossed over holidays, not given the attention of Mother’s Day – fewer cards sent; fewer long distance phone calls; fewer gifts. Yet good fathers’ are not to be taken for granted.        
         
Allan with Peter and Katie on our Cape Cod
 adventure 1998, the summer of touring colleges,
 a stop between Princeton and Harvard .
 Fathers get a bad rap on television shows and in movies where they are often put down as inadequate. It’s an image that needs to change to fit with modern fathers who are actively engaged in their children’s lives, spending time with the children, talking to them, reading to them, working hard, and giving wise advice. It shouldn’t be a competition of who is the best - between man and woman – father and mother – but a unity of family. Mother’s Day and Father’s Day should both be special. I am thankful that I was blessed with a wonderful father; that my husband has been a wonderful father to our children; and that our granddaughters have a wonderful father in our son and son-in-law.